OK back from blogging diet. It’s like a diet where instead of not eating food I don’t blog instead. Anyways, to business, and I just blacked out. To the four conversations I had open at the time, my sincerest apologies. And yes, that last sentence was just to say that I had four conversations open at the same time. Anyways, back to the blackout. So we have our little electric box in the laundry room, which is next to the dining room and the kitchen. OK not the best explanation ever, but if you’ve been to my house, you’ll know what I’m talking about.
So every time this happens, for some reason I assume there is some psycho murderer dude in the house. Naturally I go in first, knowing that my family are asleep/my brother is in his room, and get ready. Get ready to kick ass, that is. Well I haven’t had any of this training or nothing in the ways of Kung Fu or Jackie Chan, but one thing I do know is their use as a verb is all you need to really kick some butt. For example, my year 12 physics teacher to Anthony Le on numerous occasions: “Don’t make me Jackie Chan your rear end, young man!”
A couple of random dudes running away after they discovered the house they just broke into was actually mine.
Well I always loosen up as I venture out into the darkness. I like to keep it real and I know that I’m not the biggest guy in the world so if I were to ever get into a fight I would rely on reflexes and superspeed to beat the dude. I’d bide my time patiently and when he’d try and hit me and then I’d do this mad move which would probably definitely involve commando rolls and ass-kicking manoeuvres and then I’d win. And then I’d be a hero and save the day and I’d get sponsored by the other heroes in this world – Cadbury – and get unlimited triple chocolate ice cream forever.
The Nigerian soccer team demonstrate the different stages of an ass-kicking commando role.
Speaking of sponsorships, I just realised today whilst speaking with James that I haven’t played cricket/held a cricket ball since that damn USyd game back in March. Pretty insane period of time considering I used to play ever day pretty much. In the meanwhile, I haven’t let myself go though just because it’s offseason, I’ve been training. As I think I’ve stated before I’m playing soccer, so it’s all good. I realise that I’m hopeless, but that was to be expected I spose. We haven’t won any of our five games to start the season with 3 losses and two draws but the most frustrating thing is that we probably should have won all five. Oh well, I’ve played pretty poor two of the last three games, so I gotta pick up my game and then we’ll win hopefully. I don’t think quickly enough and I don’t have the vision. I just can run, so maybe I think I should stick to doing that.
Another sport I’ve been thinking of trying - Jumping onto horses.
Anyways, I hope I can see you guys around more because I’d like too. Plus I think I won’t be around during your semester break so yeah. Anyways, ladies and gents, I’ll do something productive with my life and get back to you with an in depth recount of that when I can. And as you can see fromt he ridiculous amounts of photos I’ve included in this post, I’ve discovered how to use the tool properly, and just to rub it in a little more, I’ll leave you all with this piece of profound advice:
